Sgts Mess 16th Res B.C. Regt.
Seaford
Sussex. Eng.
4th July. 1917.
My Dearest One.
I cant understand at all why you are not getting my letters as I have always been writing to you regularly, I feel greatly tempted at the present moment to send you a cable to let you know that I am all right but I am afraid you would be more frightened than anything else, I have not been getting your letters either, dear, I think I have only received about four letters in the last three months, the last I recd. was last Sunday & I see by it that you are now in Victoria, I am sure you like it a lot better than Vancouver. You will see by the above address that I have left Sandling, & I must tell you candidly that I don’t like the change, although all the troops in this area are B.C. men & in Sandling they are from the East, the idea is that the men from here are to re-inforce the B.C. regiments in France; for my own part I don’t want to go to a B.C. regt, I would much rather go back to the old 15th & so would the rest of us who are here, I think it is hardly fair to the men who did such good work with the 3rd Brigade in France should be sent to a mob among whom they have no friends. Col Bott is in command here but I have not had a chance to speak to him yet, I have to start training right away but I am very much afraid I wont be able to stand it as I have’nt done very much since I came back, I will very likely have to take some courses of instruction which I know I need as I have got very stale in my drill, as you know, I don’t want to go to France again as I have had enough of it, but of course if I have to go that is all there is to it, but I am going to try & specialise in some subject & try to get on as an instructor; there are several fellows I know here from Vernon, Tate from the city office, Jack Hope that used to be in with Rube Smith & George Monger, & several others whose names I have forgotten, but it is not the same as if I was with the Highlanders, of course we came down here in kilts, but they are all Flat caps here & I am afraid they are going to take our kilts away from us, the boys will make an awful holler about it if they do. All these changes have put me in rotten spirits & I seem to have lost all interest in my work & then there is the uncertainty & anxiety about you & the children, I have heard from you so very seldom of late that I don’t know whether you are ill or well & I don’t know what you have done about George’s eye, I thought you were going to see a specialist about it, all this only adds to my longing to get back home to you dear, so that I could help you, I know that I would be far more use to my country at home than I am here, but I have found out that it is next to impossible to get back to Canada unless a man is a total wreck or is a consumptive or has some incurable disease, unfortunately I am too healthy & the doctors still keep me in A. category; they only laugh at me if I say I am sick, another thing is, I have no pull, there are lots of young fellows in this country much more fit than I am & who have never been to the front & never will, just because they have the pull with the big bugs up above, & there are several thousand Canadian Officers in this country unemployed, if I had my way I would have the whole lot of them reverted to the ranks & sent over to France to win their commisions, it is my firm opinion that the majority who take commisions in Canada, do so, because they know they wont have to fight, but all this is beside the point & I am sure it does not interest you very much, but it does make me sore to see casualties marching back to France cheerfully, because their lot on this side has not been what it might be, & able bodied men holding down good jobs all the time & scared of their lives to lose them & be sent to France. however, I suppose it is all in the days work & when this weary war is over & we get back home to our loved ones, perhaps we will forget all these things. I suppose you have read in the papers about the air raids over London, they are terrible I was in the one at Folkstone some time ago, it was an awful sight, the heartbreak of it was to see the poor women & children, dead & dying I will never forget it, it is bad enough to see men killed & wounded on the battlefield & to see them suffer, but to see women & children suffer the way I saw them is enough to turn the brain, Thank God there is no chance of the like happening in Canada, I would go crazy if I thought that you were exposed to such danger. When will all this awful war be over & when will I get home to see you again, love, will that time ever come, it will soon be three years now since I saw you, the three most miserable years of my life, will we ever have the same old homelife again, it seems to me an eternity. God knows, dear Heart, that my only ambition now is to get home to you again & to try to make you happy & make up to you for the cruel miserable months that we have been separated, once I get home to you, nothing will ever part us again, no matter what happens, we will starve together first. My Heart & my soul are yours love & yours alone, & remember that no matter what happens, even if I am killed (which is not likely just yet) my last thought will be of you, my own dear darling Wife. I remember in one of your letters where you said I was to remember that there was another set of twins to get yet, well dear, rest assured if I ever get home we will get them all right, even if we have to work overtime, eh, & you say you will tease me all the time, all right, love, go ahead, I will be the happiest man alive to be with you & to know that you are fond enough of me to tease me, but I don’t think you will have to coax me, three years is a long time & I have saved up an awful lot of energy. I am sure you will be enjoying yourself in Victoria, the place must be looking lovely just now & it will be splendid for the children, do you let them go in the sea at all, I am sure it would do them a world of good & you too, dear, don’t you ever take a dip, I am sure you would enjoy it, I suppose you have no notion yet of going back to Vernon, don’t you think you would like to go back there again, somehow I think I would, it is so much quieter than living in a big city, & when I get back I want to be as quiet as I can, so that I can enjoy your company all the more. Now, dear love, I am going to close, God knows I hope you get this one, so that you will know that I am all right & I hope that I will be getting one from you very soon too, even if you don’t hear from me very regularly dear, don’t forget that I am true to you & you alone & although you are my wife you are also my sweetheart & I love you, God knows how I love you & I will never love anyone else. Kiss dear George & my own wee Girlie for me, love, & give them a great big love from Daddy, & for you my own darling wife, you already have my heart my soul & my life & all my love & these you will always have till the end of the chapter, God bless you Heart of my Heart & believe me to be for ever & ever your own XXXXXXXX loving Husband XXXX
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