Ward G.
Canadian Milit. Hospital,
Kirkdale, Liverpool.
Dec. 16., '17.

My dear Lulu

This is Sunday; it is raining & we are all C.B. until the boat goes. The men going are standing around ready to go, & expect it to be this afternoon sometime. "Oh that I had the wings of an aeroplane."

I had a letter from my brother - rejoicing at the news that I was likely to be in England for Xmas, & saying that he was trying to arrange a family reunion for Xmas day & urging me to do my best to get leave. When they are all so kind & so evidently enjoy my being with them, I feel like a hypocrite in wishing myself in Canada. The only thing that helps me is that one of my sisters anyway knows the principal reason. Dear Lulu, would you fly over here for a day or two seeing the military people here have clipped my wings!

So far my "Last Pay Cheque" has not arrived, but I am hoping for it someday this week. When it comes - if there is no possible chance of getting a boat - I shall apply for another leave. The railways are restricted for use of men coming on leave from France (rightly too), but I may possibly get it just the same. If not, it will be "Xmas in the Workhouse."

I wonder what sort of Xmas you have spent. I hope it will have been a very happy one in spite of the lessened family circle. But I am wondering most of all whether that awful explosion at Halifax has involved any of your relatives or friends. I cannot think that either you or your father or mother could have been visiting there at the time. I suppose it will be another week & a half before I can hear any news at all, but I am sure you will let me know as soon as possible. Perhaps a number of fugitives are in Digby even now. The horrors of war seem to spread. We only get general news about it here, but I know from reading war news that it must have been a horrible time.

You ask me when the time actually comes whether I shall leave England with a pang. I believe I shall. I was born here & whilst I have received the greater part of my education in a Canadian university, & become more Canadian in thought than English, yet I love England though I rail against her faults. She is very, very beautiful, simple & honest. And most of all my relatives are here. And yet I find myself following Browning. I could love any country, for all have beauties & excellencies. I want so much to see the Kingdom of God that I am inclined to lose a lot of prejudice. It cannot come I know until all nations are made good & so I want everybody.

I wonder more than ever now where I shall land. Perhaps none will go to Halifax; wouldn't it be beautiful if it was St. John & I could get right to Digby. Wherever I land I shall apply to stay in Nova Scotia before I go West. What I should like best would be to slip back to Digby some evening unknown to anyone & come straight up to the Parsonage & find you at home. I dont like crowds & I dont like receptions. I like to meet people, but I like to meet them best in their own homes when we can sit & talk quietly. Wont you come with me after we have had a nice visit together to Smallies & one or two of the other people I met, Lulu dear?

I really think you must be working too hard, Lulu. From the number of new pupils you have told me about, & the times you finish: one letter said nearly ten at night. How many pupils have you, Lulu? As to getting up earlier to get exercise - well I suppose that may be good, but the long hours of confinement in a room, & the mental strain for so long must be very hard on you. But it ill becomes a man to lecture when he doesn't know all the facts. You will understand me though I am sure. I want you to be real healthy & strong when I come back.

I am glad you have the photo I sent, & the two sets of p.c's. The 'Sea-gulls' was one that I liked very much - as indeed I do all sea-scapes. Do you think I could take a bit of the sea with me out West? We must see what can be done, shall we?

Your "queer ideas about 'interior decorations'" made me laugh. So have I, but I dont think I shall ever attempt to pose as an authority on the subject. I will just discuss the matter with you. I hate discords in music, pictures, or anything else. But I love harmonies. Dont get any of those p.cs. framed however, for I have some very fine pictures which you must see if I can only get them over to you safely. I have three original watercolors, a fine colored print of the doorway of "St. Marks", Venice, a col. print of the "Piper of Dreams", a black & white print of Rheims, an interior of St. Marks, an artist's proof of "A Wayside Cross" - exactly like those I used to pass in France - & six proofs of "Scenes on the Western Front", by Matania. Of course the watercolors are by far the best. I feel almost anxious to know your comments. They are practically the only souvenirs I have to bring with me - except the German lead I have for safekeeping in my arm. What a time we shall have discussing everything under the sun!

You are right, Lulu dear, I shall surprise Mrs Smallie & the rest by walking in sometime. We certainly must visit them together. Let us surprise them. They have been expecting me so long that they must think I have been fooling them. Why I well remember you writing me about the garden you put in last Spring & saying that possibly I would be home to see it! Then you thought I should be in time for harvest; then to eat some of the products; then for something else; then for Xmas. I am ashamed of myself, Lulu, & beg you pardon.

You say that you wondered why Mr Rose was not overseas. Well I dont wonder, for in my heart I wish he was. I think a great deal of him but that one thing he lacked. He was wonderfully kind to me - also Mrs Rose - but somehow they seem to think it more Xtian to work at home. Not that they said so. We dont all think alike somehow, but I know that they admire those who do go. They seem to wonder at the spirit which will make men throw up their homes, & come overseas. I want you to meet them both first & then tell me what you think of them afterwards.

Now I must draw to a close & get this letter posted. In my next letter I may be able to send you another photo of myself. If you say I looked thin in my last photo my next looks all bones. Anyway, I think you may be interested in a new aspect of your correspondent.

I should like to end my letter with better news, but I cannot. I can just send my best love - just written & that is all. Perhaps you will be surprised at your Tom when he gets back for he may not be just as he appears in either photos or letters. I wonder what you will think!

Well Lulu dear, Good Night. I too must "roll in" for the orderly will be round in a few minutes to turn out the lights.

With loving wishes for the New Year & with great hopes for it too
Yours as ever Tom.